Meeting With the Anonymous Egg Donor

Egg donation regulations vary across the countries. According to law, egg donation can be known or anonymous. It may happen during a fertility journey that parents request meeting with the anonymous egg donor. Further, we will discuss whether is it possible and what other alternatives do intended parents have.

It is not hard to understand why intended parents want to meet their egg donor in person. However it is important to take several factors into consideration :

When intended parents request meeting with the anonymous egg donor, the personality of a donor has to be revealed. This step completely opposes the regulation and the idea of an anonymous egg donation, during which the anonymity and privacy of a donor are absolutely untouched. While parents might promise and claim that they respect their donor’s privacy and will not disclose any details from the meeting, it will still come in conflict with the initial agreement and country’s regulation.  

More importantly, in some countries egg donation is possible and allowed only when it is anonymous. The best of surrogacy and egg donation agencies operate accordingly, within the framework of country’s regulation. They do not allow revealing donor’s personal information.  At the same time, agencies will have a database of egg donors which contains all of the essential information for the donation procedure – such as donor’s medical history, medical records, proof of her mental health, information about her appearance – eye color, hair color and etc.


When can intended parents meet with the egg donor?

Meeting with an egg donor in person may be of high-priority for some intended parents.  If this is the case, it is essential to consider it before planning the program and choosing the destination. Intended parents will have to choose the country where surrogacy is regulated by the law, is legal and egg donation does not have to be anonymous. When anonymity is not a requirement in the country and donor can be known, intended parents can then get acquainted with her through the personal meeting.

One more factor to remember is that the possibility of known egg donation does not necessarily guarantee it. Egg donor herself might have privacy issues and  have no  desire to expose her identity. Surrogacy and egg donation agencies will first have to clarify this issue and choose the donors from the database,  who do not mind being introduced  to the patients. Intended parents should always consider contacting surrogacy and egg donation agencies first and discussing their priorities and inquiries before actually planning the program.


Travelling Egg Donor

When parents need to choose an egg donor, they are first of all, concentrated on her satisfactory health condition. Usually professional agencies guarantee and are responsible for having mentally and physically healthy donors. Additionally, parents pay a lot of attention to appearance and ethnicity – it is natural to be concerned about physical genetic inheritance of your child.


It may happen that the desired egg donor is not in the database of the same country, where parents are participating in a program. That’s when they use a travelling egg donor.  Based on experience and in sake of positive outcome, we have decided to share our knowledge with our readers  – what should you take into account before choosing a travelling egg donor?

We have listed several hints for you :


  • Donor should not arrive at the destination earlier than 5 or 6 days before the egg collection. Here is why : yes, donor seems good, stimulation has started and everything is in order. However, on the 7-8th day of stimulation it may appear that follicles have not grown sufficiently and the program has to be cancelled. In this case, intended parents have to pay donor a partial fee for the service and cover the costs of medications that were needed during this 7-8 days. If the simulation problem is spotted after donor’s arrival and she has to go back, parents have to pay for the whole package. Of course, nobody needs such a risk. When donor arrives 5 days before the collection procedure, it is already clear by then, that everything is in order and donor is ready for the egg pick up.
  • Make sure that doctors from both countries (program country and donor country) are in touch with each other throughout the whole preparation process. First of all, they will need to exchange all of the important data about the donor. Secondly, in case something goes wrong, both sides will be equally responsible for the consequences and there will be no chaos while figuring out whose fault it was.
  • Don’t feel uncomfortable and require the stamped passport paper of the donor. Parents should be sure that the donor who arrived is the one they have chosen. For analogical reason intended parents can require their egg donor’s hair . Anytime in the future it will be possible to compare it with the DNA of a child. Yes, we know that this sounds weird but the history of egg donation remembers a lot of cases, when donors were changed behind parents’ back (common reason was that the desired donors did not have enough eggs). Parents should insure themselves from such cases, so why not double check? Additionally, this kind of approach will reveal the professionalism of the egg donation agency. Be sure that honest and successful agency will never refuse to fulfill your desire to feel protected from fraud.
  • Make sure that your travelling donor will have a companion, someone who will be able to provide assistance if needed. After the collection procedure as well as during the stimulation, egg donor should not travel alone. Check that your donor is in a well accommodated hotel with a good nutrition included – agencies charge you enough money for this arrangements.


Reasons of Using an Egg Donor

How should parents know if it is time to start thinking about finding an egg donor? What if it is too early or what if donation is not needed at all? We will try to figure it out.


First of all, we have to mention that egg donation has become really successful. Procedures that use fresh embryo (! not frozen) have the likelihood of 43% to result in pregnancy.  A number of couples that want to expend their families have now the possibility to do so.


Situations vary. Females may experience fertility issues of several kinds. It is advisable to use an egg donor, when :


  • Follicle-stimulating hormone (FSH) level is high

In females, FSH helps to regulate menstrual cycle and produce eggs by ovaries.  Doctors measure the amount of the hormone in a blood sample. High level of FSH may mean the loss of ovarian function, menopause, polycystic ovary syndrome, chromosomal abnormality or the inability of the body to produce good quality eggs for fertilization.


  • Luteinizing hormone (LH) level is high

Similar to FSH, LH hormone regulates menstrual cycle and egg production. Doctors measure its amount in a blood or urine sample. Normally, levels of LH and FSH are rising and lowering simultaneously.  High levels of luteinizing hormone may also mean ovarian failure.


  • Anti-mullerian hormone (AMH) level is low

AMH is a substance produced by egg sacs, containing immature eggs. Blood test will reflect the remaining egg supply of a female. If the hormone level is low, the ovarian reserve is low accordingly.


  • Polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS)

PCOS is a condition when female hormones are out of balance. We have already discussed this issue and you can read more about polycystic ovary syndrome on our blog.


  • Females are over 40

As we have already mentioned several times, age plays one of the major roles in infertility. Females in their 40s usually have high FSH and LH hormone levels, as well as low AMH level. With age, body’s reproductive system is becoming less functional. Females over 43 years tend to use egg donors for better outcomes. Ageing of Europe is also a demographic phenomenon and is characterised by a decrease in fertility. Many couples avoid creating/expanding families until they are 40. Consequently, their chances of reproduction without assistance are decreasing significantly. Same applies for the USA.


  • Females have menopause

Menopause is a normal, biological process for females in their 40s or 50s. However, it stops menstrual period permanently and so does it end fertility.


  • Mother may transmit a genetic disease

Many couples prefer to use an egg donor in order to prevent transmitting genetic disease to a child.


  • Several IVF attempts have failed

As we already said, in vitro fertilization is a process of fertilizing egg with sperm outside the body, in a laboratory dish. After couples have experienced 4 unsuccessful IVF attempts and doctors think the egg quality is poor, then it’s better to consider finding a donor.


Egg donation is used widely by LGBT couples. Same sex male couples from all around the world as using the donation  procedure to expend their families and become parents.


If couples experience above mentioned issues and doctors have already advised to think about donation, then they got a reasonable motive to do so. However, with the right agency and professionals, there is nothing to worry about 🙂